I Never Golfed With Bruce
Bruce Lockwood died this week. He was 62 and died of cancer. I didn’t even know he was sick. It is highly likely you don’t know who Bruce Lockwood is, but he was a really, really, really, great guy. When I was starting in the music business 15 years ago Bruce was a seasoned musician who just moved to town and could lay down a bass groove like nobody’s business.
I had a little rockabilly/blues combo at the time and he was my favorite guy to play with. He would tell me about the “good old days” of playing in rock/blues bands out east and he had the ability to do it without being condescending or overly sentimental. Just a blues guy who had fun stories to tell.
Bruce and I haven’t played any music together for quite some time but he saw a facebook post I made of me golfing while out on tour. He messaged me and said, “Hey, I didn’t know you golfed, let’s get together when you get back”. Of course I wanted to golf with Bruce! What a hoot that would be. I could hear more stories from the musical trenches and reconnect with my favorite, most grooviest bass player. We never golfed. That was my first thought when I heard he passed. I thought “what a dick I am for not making that happen, and now I never can”.
Which leads me to the point that I’ve heard from so many other atheists about death: no afterlife = more precious life. I wholeheartedly agree with that. What we have is the here, the now and a beautiful world filled with beautiful people. It shouldn’t take the death of a friend to make me reconnect with loved ones. But sometimes death is the ultimate reminder. It is the end point that can bring life more clearly into focus. When I lost three of my beloved dogs last year I was absolutely devastated to the point of being numb. But as I slowly came back from the shock, I re-evaluated my life and how to live it. I wanted just one more time to hug them, or play with them; I wanted just one more individual quirk from them that made them unique on this planet. I think there should be a balance in life of remembering the past, living in the present and looking toward the future. We have to live in those three dimensions and each one of us has to find the golden mean of happiness in proportioning those three temporal aspects of our existence.
I never golfed with Bruce. This week I will be sure to do several things that I’ve been putting off for awhile. Something that makes someone else happy. Something that enhances life.